The ability to regulate your emotions in any type of situation increases your emotional intelligence. In this exercise, you will rate your typical level of emotional regulation in specific scenarios that will help identify where additional focus, learning, and an action plan are needed.

SELF RATING SCALE
Use this scale for each scenario to rate your level of emotional regulation.

0 – Neutral: Calm, indifferent, or composed
1 – Little Heightened: Tiny bit of an emotional reaction, but easily managed or calmed down and isn’t affecting overall response
2 – Some Heightened: Emotions lightly leading response
3 – Heightened: Emotions clearly playing a role in response back
4 – Strong Heightened: Intense emotions are leading the response back with little regulation
5 – Other: Share a different observed response (e.g., shut down, loss of all regulation)


SCENARIOS
These scenarios below are a sliver of the different situations out there employees can handle on a daily basis. Inserting more common scenarios for your team or yourself are encouraged on this exercise to receive the best self reflection.

Differences of opinion between you and a colleague. 0 1 2 3 4 5 Other:
Colleague was rude to you. 0 1 2 3 4 5 Other:
Colleague(s) didn’t include you in a decision. 0 1 2 3 4 5 Other:
You’re being micromanaged or over explained. 0 1 2 3 4 5 Other:
Someone appears to dismiss you. 0 1 2 3 4 5 Other:
A confrontation begins to happen between you and a colleague. 0 1 2 3 4 5 Other:
Someone gives you feedback. 0 1 2 3 4 5 Other:
Colleague is not completing their tasks on time or to certain standards, which directly affects your work. 0 1 2 3 4 5 Other:
A colleague is not being direct in their communication and taking significant time to get to their point. 0 1 2 3 4 5 Other:

Go through each scenario that received a score of 1 or higher. Why do you think your response was heightened? What can you do in the future to help with the heightened response(s)?


SELF AWARENESS
Self awareness is a component of emotional intelligence and is needed in order to grow. We encourage after completion of the scenarios section, to ask a or multiple colleagues how they view you are regulating your emotions in these situations.

If wanting a staff member you’re leading to give feedback, consider it to be anonymous to encourage more honest feedback.


REFLECTION
Self Reflection and/or Discussion Questions
As a group or on your own, reflect on your responses and any themes occurring. Optional questions are below.

• Are there goals you can create to help assist with development? If so, what could they be?
• What was learned when a colleague(s) shared their view on you regulating your emotions in these scenarios? Were there discrepancies? Were you surprised by anything?
• Are there other situations/scenarios you reflected on outside of the ones on this exercise? What were they and did they provide additional insight?
• What’s one take away from this exercise?
• What support would be helpful for you to continue to grow with regulating emotions? What about self awareness with emotions?

Management Lens Questions
Note: Management lens questions should be discussed when someone has people management responsibilities.

• Do you notice a response difference with emotions when speaking to your leaders, peers vs. direct reports? If yes, please explain.
• Are there specific management situations where emotions tend to lead your response? If yes, please explain.
• How impactful do you think your management of emotions is to the staff you lead?
• What support from your leader can help with your and your teams growth in this area?
• Where can you grow as a leader with your emotional regulation?

For more information about this material, email kmcclain@praeliscere.com or visit https://praeliscere.com/. Copyright Kathryn McClain.

The ability to regulate your emotions in any type of situation increases your emotional intelligence. In this exercise, you will rate your typical level of emotional regulation in specific scenarios that will help identify where additional focus, learning, and an action plan are needed.